Making the decision to go nomadic, Landmark Forum impact, Taking time apart, When the universe rearranges itself for you, and more.
Guest: Ashley Bledsoe
Ashley Bledsoe is not only Mike’s wife, but also has a master’s degree in Sports and Recreation Management, and has been supporting, coaching and facilitating groups in the fitness industry for the past 10 years. However, over the past three years, she’s been delving into deeper healing work. She’s passionate about coaching female entrepreneurs to forge deeper connections to themselves, each other and creating unique and practical ways to bring that to their businesses.
Ashley is committed to guiding and supporting people to deeply know and love themselves, understanding that THIS is the way to create powerful partnerships. She came to this realization in her own marriage after eight years of being together. By working on her relationship with herself, she was able to strengthen her connection and bring her partnership to the next level.
Making the decision to go nomadic
The Bledsoe’s went nomadic on February 1st, 2018. They left their house in Encinitas,CA, sold a lot of their stuff, stored some of it, and got on the road carrying only two bags each. The decision to go nomadic was both individual and mutual.
Ashley came to a conclusion with the help of her business mentor, Gigi Sage, that she wants to live a lifestyle that includes travel and spending time in different places, learning about different cultures.
Mike had intentions to travel for a long time, but kept pushing taking time off. He thought he will travel the world only once he was in his 40’s (he’s 36 now), but in December 2017, he decided he’s not waiting anymore. He’s ready to go.
Both Ashley and Mike are into personal development and did a lot of work in that area for the past few years. Only last summer they allowed themselves to took a break from personal development and just enjoy a good time partying, playing, etc. Eventually a couple of months ago, they both got excited to get on the road and explore the world leaving their stuff behind, and they did it!
Landmark Forum impact
Mike was invited to Landmark Forum for the first time around 6 years ago, but ended up attending a Landmark event only in August 2017. The timing was right though, around then Mike had turbulence in his business and felt misaligned.
During the weekend at Landmark Forum, Mike realized he used to take people’s choices away from them. Instead of inviting and asking people close to him to do something with him, he didn’t reach out assuming he knows what’s going on in their life. For example: He didn’t invite his sister to visit him in California because she lives in Tennessee with 3 kids.
Mike also realized he was settling and not taking action on a lot of things. After Landmark Forum, he started taking action and one of the things he avoided was tough conversations with his wife, Ashley. Before the event at Landmark Forum, the Ashley and Mike talked about splitting up.
Taking time apart
The Bledsoe’s decided to take a month apart from one another. It mostly stemmed from Mike, who wasn’t happy with the relationship. He wanted time apart, so he can focus and get clear on what he wants their relationship to be and what he doesn’t want it to be.
The Bledsoe’s weren’t completely apart, they talked on the phone almost daily and went on weekly dates. As time went on, they enjoyed each other’s company more. They both started identifying what they actually want from the relationship and talked about it with an open heart.
Mike’s friend, Anat Peri (episode 49), helped him see that he wasn’t happy with the roles he and Ashley played in their relationship, it wasn’t Ashley herself. When Mike told Ashley he wanted time apart, she freaked out in the beginning, but over time realized also that it was not about her, else Mike needed to figure out his own stuff.
Ashley also realized she was playing the role of someone who needs approval and permission for everything. When she was alone at the house, she took action on things she wanted to do, like organizing a messy room. She had a realization that she needs to take on a different, more active and assertive role.
What helped Ashley change her perspective was imagining her life with and without Mike, and imagining what she would want her life to be like. When she imagined her life without Mike, she realized she’d still be ok, but she would enjoy her future with him much more.
Mike realized he was resenting Ashley for stuff related to money, but was distracting himself from thinking and talking about it. Once he talked to Ashley and they cleared things out, he immediately got over it. The day after the talk, he was all in on their relationship. All of a sudden their relationship got really easy.
FRIEND OF THE SHOW
Training Camp for the Soul
About two months after their relationship breakthrough, both Ashley and Mike participated in Journey to Love, Anat Peri’s retreat. Half-way through the retreat, Mike told Anat he and Ashley are going to help her get future participants. They loved and benefited from the retreat so much they wanted everybody to have access for it, which is how they came up with Training Camp for the Soul (episode 49).
Peri’s retreat helped Mike realize he built his entire life based around meeting the perceived expectation of others. Mike knew it before on an intellectual level, but after the retreat he felt it in his soul. He felt lighter, and happier, and those feelings were there to stay. Mike realized he can do whatever he wants, and made shifts in his relationship with Ashley, his family, his friends, and his business.
Ashley’s biggest takeaway was to have more compassion to herself, her family, and friends.
When the universe rearranges itself for you
After the Bledsoe’s decided they want to travel the world, they planned to get on the road in April 2018, but once the decision was made, some things fell through and some things fell apart. The universe rearranged itself to fit their desires.
Dates of events they were committed to started changing, they got invited to events abroad, and suddenly they could leave on their trip sooner. The change was fast and turbulent, but the Bledsoe’s were cool with it, following their true calling.
To make the travel happen sooner, Mike recorded a bunch of shows in advance, and in a couple of weeks he and Ashley scrambled to close things out and get out of their house. They didn’t store much stuff, else gave it away, and it made them feel great.
Training on the road
The Bledsoe’s find it easy to work out on the road so far. They started their trip spending two weeks in Austin, TX, staying with their friend Sam Pogue of Onnit. They spent a lot of time at Onnit, which made it easy to train and move almost every day, sometimes multiple times a day.
They are now in Costa Rica, where they dropped-in at CrossFit gyms, and went on jogs, did yoga, and other bodyweight exercises.
Feeling light on the road
Two weeks on the road and life has been quite easy so far for The Bledsoe’s. They had a couple of days where they missed their home, their bed, and their friends, but those moments were short and passed. They are happy and excited about the journey they embarked on!
The Bledsoe’s attribute a lot of the lightness they feel thanks to the retreat they did with Anat Peri. The next Training Camp for the Soul retreat is on March 15–21 at Idyllwild, CA.